PATIENT HUSBANDRY
For her to open her heart, her body, her being into the beautiful moment of blossoming that I desire, I need to become still.
Apprenticeship to Love: The crooked path of marriage (May 20, 2026)
TODAY'S MEDITATION
She once asked me for my patience. It was one of the few things she asked for, explicitly. I wasn't paying attention.
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"Loving a woman who hasn't been loved correctly takes patience... So please be patient with me."
I saw this some time ago. Now, I read it almost daily.
It reminds me of her tenderness, her desire to open, and her need for my still and unwavering attention.
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The seeds are beginning to germinate. I am the husbandman of my garden. I know that forcing things –seeds, blossoms– can be a useful short-term strategy to enjoy Her beauty. I know also that forcing Her to blossom in my time, not Hers, damages the nature I love.
It is always better to hold the space with patient devotion. It is always better to allow Her to move and unfold as She needs.
And so it is with marriage. The husbandman holds the space. He applies patience and devotion. He trusts his wife to find her ways to her beauty, in her own time, the moments of her blossoming.
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A teacher whom I admire recently reminded me of this: when the masculine partner is moving with desire the feminine withdraws into stillness. She protects herself against his will to conquer. I know this. In my mind I know this. But I need to be reminded in my body. For her to open her heart, her body, her being into the beautiful moment of blossoming that I desire, I need to become still. So still. So patient. Devotional…
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Sometimes the spring season can be long, slow, and cold. It is a reminder to be patient and devotional.
Sometimes, the season is in a hurry.
Yesterday the sun came out. Yesterday my beloved reached out from her silence. I heard the music of her voice, felt her opening.
Today, warmed by the sun, my garden begins to move. I am allowing Her to move as She needs. I am slow, appreciative, enjoying it all.
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My beloved will take all the time she needs. With practice and attention, I am becoming deep enough to be the husbandman she needs to blossom, in her way, in her time, into her beauty.
TODAY’S INSPIRATIONS
🌀When a person can't find a deep sense of meaning, they distract themselves with pleasure. (Viktor Frankl)
🌀When a man's sexual desire is scattered all over the place, he will inevitably struggle to find his purpose & dharma. A scattered sexual energy leads to an immense lack of clarity. One-pointed devotion is the only cure. (Preston Bryant)
🌀I never thought I’d come to you like this. (My beloved, my oracle)
