SPRING! LET THE MUD DO IT'S WORK
Above all, I want to rescue myself from my impatience and my fear and my doubt.
Apprenticeship to Love: Meditations for the sacred masculine on this crooked path
March 21, 2026
TODAY'S MEDITATION
In the northern hemisphere it is Spring now. The season of mud, of rooting. The season for husbandry.
The season for patience. As such, it can be the hardest season. Because I am impatient for the flowering. I am impatient with the necessary wet and still-dark and so-slow time of mud and rooting.
...
It is the season that reminds me of who I am and who I aspire to be: *he who must be trusted*. The husband. A man of so much depth and awareness, so much patience, that the mud and the rooting are to me beautiful. Sacred. All that is required in this season is my patience. And thus, my practice. Because, to be still, silent, solitary is hard work.
Rooting myself. Standing in Tadasana. Breathing, long and slow and deep. Becoming even more silent than winter's last days. Knowing my roots. Allowing myself to be nourished by the mud and the dark of my beloved's strange moods and needs. My roots, her flowering. In her season. To be patient with all of this. I don't find it easy.
...
I feel this slow solitude, the mud of this season, as a problem. I am impatient to "fix" this solitude. I want to rescue my beloved, and all of those near to me, from the dark underworld of their own season of mud. Above all, I want to rescue myself from my impatience and my fear and my doubt.
...
It's Spring. The season for my deepening. The season to be patient. To be the husband for the flourishing to come, in time. The husband to the flow of the divine feminine, Demeter, holding this slow space with patience I struggle to feel, trusting that held, this muddy Spring opens into ease and flowering into her radiance.
...
Be still. Remember that I've known this season before, and before. Trust the nourishment. Trust the slow, silent mud of this season.
TODAY'S INSPIRATIONS
🌀...once the realization is accepted that even between the closest people infinite distances exist, a marvellous living side-by-side can grow up for them, if they succeed in loving the expanse between them, which gives them the possibility of always seeing each other as a whole and before an immense sky. ( Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet)
🌀Now be silent.
Let the One who creates the words speak.
He made the door.
He made the lock.
He also made the key.
(Rumi)
🌀You're not like that now. (My beloved, my oracle)
